#19 Pyaaz Bytes: A Blessed Thing

Heyo People,

After a long hiatus, here I am again, wanting again to rant about my life. I decided to write today because I like writing better than speaking (yes, I am the text over calls person most times) and no one listens to my shit anyways, so I hope someone might read it.

I woke up at 7:45 am today, which is 3 hours prior to my usual waking up time. This miracle happened because I woke up at 6:30 am yesterday after being coaxed by a friend to go for a run, hence I slept at 12, which is 3 hours prior to my usual dozing off time. I was supposed to wake up at 6 again, but I lazed around because my friend did not call me, so lack of extrinsic motivation, and also, I am me, so lack of intrinsic motivation. I finally motivated myself to wake up and workout a little because my legs were already aching and taking too much rest would not help. Also, I really want to be fit and healthy because that is how humans are supposed to be and I am not feeling good about my physical health right now. I have also gained a lot of weight which is now showing on my body, which I do not really mind as I still love how I look and I do look awesome, but my clothes do not fit me anymore and some of them are expensive. So I need to drop off that belly fat.

After waking up and wasting 10 mins checking social media, same way I did above by digressing from the point, I put on some music and went to brush my teeth. While looking at myself in the mirror, I felt so blessed. I felt blessed for being able to live alone and having the freedom to listen to music out loud and groove to it while brushing my teeth. Yes, this simple thing made me feel happy. Then I did start thinking about work and ten other stressors which plague my life, but despite all that, I did have the moment, which made me happy. I sensed a strong appreciation for my mind and soul because even after so much recent mental and emotional turmoil, it can still conjure the good things in my life which truly over power the bad ones and make even the difficult events feel like a blessing. Or maybe it is just a result of sleeping for more than 4 hours after a month. Who knows. 😛

I then did some jumping jacks and started to fall asleep while doing crunches, so I did a 10 minute zumba for which I was checking the time every 2 minutes because my stamina dips faster than the logical arguments of bhakts (wait, that’s not possible, they have no logic), followed by a 10 minute guided meditation audio, during which I thought about blogging because the audio was asking me to be in the present and I LISTEN TO NO MAN! 😛

Drinking my hot water with honey and ginger right now along with eating seeds, while realizing that it is already 10 am and these activities should be done 2 hours earlier. Better late than never though.

Here’s hoping for more good things to happen today and a better tomorrow.

Cheers.

Poetic Musing: Caged

Locked you in a cage,
Thought you will be mine forever.
Clutching the keys,
Tightly in my palm,
Obsessing ,
Brooding,
How I became,
An incessant vigilante, always on alert.
Now I realize,
How in this quest of mine,
I actually imprisoned my own self,
In the fear and obsession of losing you.
Now that the cage has been breached,

I have decided to set ourselves free,

So you be yourself,
And I be me.

– Mumuksha Bharti

Modified by – Sowmya Jain

Movie Musing : Bohemian Rhapsody

It has been 3 hours since I got out of the movie theatre after watching Bohemia Rhapsody, and I cannot get over it. The sound, feel and characters of the movie are still lingering around me, both inside and outside of my mind. It feels like a beautiful hangover, which is tingling me, giving me goosebumps.
For the first time in my life, I took myself out to the movies alone. I do not feel it is a big deal but it was a first anyway. Moreover, my friends here do not listen to Queen ( poor unfortunate souls) and a non-fan would really not enjoy the movie. Fortunately, I was not alone in the theatre. There were 50 other fans with me and we were all singing, clapping, rejoicing and crying together. It was one of the best theatre crowds ever.
Although I am a fan, I did not have much knowledge about Mercury and his antics. When I had first listened to Bohemian Rhapsody 2 years ago (yes, I am a late bloomer, but anyway), the first thought that came to my mind was that Freddie Mercury is a genius. You have to be a genius to write such an eccentrically beautiful song. Fortunately, the movie showed it to me and how! One cannot be a “regular” person to create such a legacy. He named the band Queen because it had no meaning. Bohemian Rhapsody had random words to create a mystery, which made the song more famous. Poetry cannot be loved if everything is explained.
The most astounding feature of his character was his confidence, and that is what made him. He was confident about his bucked teeth, queer sense of style, which brought about a revolution in the industry. Who would have imagined a group of boys to be bold enough to cross-dress for the video “I want to Break Free” in the 80s. He taught me that if you are confident about what you are doing, no matter however you look or talk, no one can take it away from you.
Freddie’s urge to be accepted was a major theme of the movie and it did touch many chords in me. I won’t state the reasons here (I also am unaware of most of them), but I have had troubles being accepted by my peers and the people around me, I guess I still do. Most of it is psychological too, just like in the case of Freddie. The songs he wrote for us misfits were something which helped a lot of us. “A band of misfits for the misfits.” It truly was.
So beautiful it is when you realize the origin of your favorite songs. What pain and pleasure the artists went through to produce such beauty. I could not help but wonder about Linkin Park and Chester Bennington. The resonating lyrics of each song, the pain in his voice, and the suicide.
The most beautiful part of the movie was love. The love between Mary and Freddie because of the belief they had in each other, despite Freddie being gay. The love among the band members and their belief in each other. Even though Freddie went out of control and left the band, they loved and revered him, and eventually got back together. They truly believed he was a legend, he still is.
Even though the movie was Freddie’s biopic, it did not let the other band members go unnoticed. It showed the contribution of each and every member, without whom it would not have been Queen.
The Live-aid concert, in the end, was beauty, and it brought tears to my eyes, not only because the songs were beautiful, but because of Freddie’s passion which reflected completely in his performance. He was immersed in the performance so beautifully that he forgot all his fears, and you could feel it too.
In spite of all the negative publicity that Freddie and the band received, the people loved him and will always remember him, not because he was queer, but because of his passion for music and the masterpieces which the band created together. He will forever be known what he believed he was born for- music.